


Time's A Gentle Stream (longer than it seems)

by CaptainLeBubbles



Category: LazyTown
Genre: Family Issues, Gen, M/M, Romantic Comedy, Tags to be added, mundane AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-15
Updated: 2016-12-22
Packaged: 2018-09-08 17:03:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8853205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainLeBubbles/pseuds/CaptainLeBubbles
Summary: In which Sportacus loses his parents, gains his sister, and moves halfway across the country to cope.In which Robbie doesn't want to be the world's best babysitter, until he's not and suddenly he does.Or, the mundane Lazytown au about Sportacus and Robbie finding the answers they need together.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to wait to post this till I had at least two chapters but then I was like "Theo that has literally never worked" so you get the first chapter as soon as I end it!

Robbie collapsed into his armchair with an exhausted huff. His latest scheme to make the little brats he babysat hate him and demand their parents found someone else to look after them in the evenings had, as usual, backfired, and instead the kids had gone home that evening excitedly shouting to their parents about the latest game their super cool and wonderful babysitter had played with them.

He’d wanted to scare them and convince them his house was haunted. Instead he’d gotten gooey sheets and the kids still thought he was the best at coming up with fun games.

One of these days they were going to realize these weren’t _games_.

Oh well.

Robbie reached down into the side of the armchair and fished out a piece of taffy he’d stashed in there earlier, munching absently on it while he tried to think of a new plan for tomorrow.

-/-

Sportacus tossed a box effortlessly onto his shoulder and craned his neck around to check that Stephanie was still nearby. She’d been helping with the moving for awhile, but she’d gotten bored and wanted to go play, and he’d let her, giving her strict instructions to stay near the house where he could keep an eye on her.

“We’ll go around and meet everyone later,” he’d assured her. “But I don’t want you wandering around the neighborhood until I’ve gotten to know the neighbors better.”

“Okay, Sportacus,” she’d said, uncharacteristically quiet.

He’d sighed as soon as she’d gone into the house to find out if any of her balls had been brought in yet. He didn’t like restricting her so much- one of the reasons he’d chosen the neighborhood he had was that it had a good reputation for safety, several other children around Stephanie’s age, and a layout that made it easy to keep an eye on her without keeping her in the yard. But he wasn’t familiar enough with the area yet. It was how it had to be, so he took a deep breath of resolve and hoisted up his box to carry inside.

Stephanie wasn’t about to disobey Sportacus, of course. She understood the restriction, even if she didn’t like it. But she hadn’t missed the fact that ever since their parents had died, Sportacus was always finding some reason or other to restrict her movements, and keep her near him. It wasn’t that his reasons weren’t understandable. It was just that they were always _there_. Sportacus had never minded _before_ if he couldn’t put eyes on her while she was visiting him, as long as she stayed in the neighborhood and told him who she was with.

But then… Stephanie shook her head. No, it made _sense_ that Sportacus would want her where he could see her. She would just have to live with the restriction until he was okay with him letting her off alone again.

So even though she desperately wanted to go off and explore the neighborhood and meet the other kids, she instead found the box her tennis ball and racket were in and went out to the side yard to play wall-ball with herself against the garage.

-/-

Robbie had just dozed off when he heard it. The loud, rhythmic banging coming from next door. He snapped awake and sat up, looking around frantically. Was it an air raid? It sounded like an air raid!

Oh, it was just the neighbors. He shook his head, letting sleep-addled thoughts fall away to be replaced by waking grumpiness. Something was going on next door.

Robbie was vaguely aware that the house next door had been bought out, but he wasn’t really up on the details. Someone had bought it, someone had moved in. He’d been hoping for a sweet reclusive elderly woman, someone to stay in her house all day not making racket or bringing kids around, the sort who liked to make cakes and cookies and other treats for her neighbors, perhaps.

Either he’d had no such luck, or his sweet reclusive elderly neighbor had very bad taste in music.

Grumbling loudly, Robbie stomped upstairs to his bedroom and grabbed his binoculars so he could see what was going on.

The noise was coming from beside the garage. There was a small pink girl hitting a tennis ball against the wall. How annoying. Another kid. He’d probably get stuck babysitting her too- oh well, the extra income would be nice until he’d managed to get rid of the kids. Now, parents… he looked around with the binoculars until he found the front door, which was propped open. He saw a figure enter the house, partly obscured by the box on his shoulder- and what a shoulder- and then waited a few minutes until the figure emerged once more.

 _Wow_. Robbie put his binoculars down so he could clutch at his chest in shock, staring at his wall with wide, surprised eyes. _Wow_. What a specimen! The arm had only been a taste of what was to come, and that was bulging biceps, broad shoulders, a shirt that had to be at least two sizes too small, and _oh_ , that ass. Robbie let out a happy little sigh and put up his binoculars again. He wanted to see more of this man.

A moment’s searching found him again, and Robbie honed in on his face this time. Ah! Still a specimen. Smooth, cleanshaven apart from a silly little mustache, and beautiful wavy golden-brown hair falling out from under a stupid-looking blue beanie and glasses. Perfect cheeks. A flawless bone structure. Blue eyes.

Robbie set the binoculars back down so he could sigh again. Flawless. A work of art. If this was his new neighbor- well, who could argue with that? He was certainly a step up from the recluse he’d been hoping for. Robbie certainly wouldn’t argue with having him around.

Shame he had a kid, though. Robbie’s happy smile faded away. Right.

Well, he could probably work with that. He put his binoculars back in the drawer and hurried downstairs. Halfway out the door, he turned and hurried back in, rummaging in his cabinet until he’d found a plastic container. He cut a big slice off the cake sitting on his counter- he always had a cake on his counter, partly for the kids but mostly because he loved cake- and tucked it away carefully into the plastic container. It was a big, generous portion, big enough for two. So big that it got somewhat squashed when he put the lid on the container, but hey, at least that would show them that he _was_ generous.

The man was just coming out of the house when Robbie appeared in his driveway. He grinned, and changed direction to head toward Robbie instead.

“Hello!” he said, all bright and happy cheer. “You must be the neighbors!”

Gosh, that was a _nice_ smile. Robbie’s words got stuck in his throat, so he thrust out the container of cake by way of greeting instead. The man stopped in his tracks and blinked down at it.

“Um. Thisisforyou,” Robbie said. “For. New neighbor. Reasons.”

“Oh!” There was that smile again. He took the container and peeked into it. “Cake?”

“Yeah, well.” Robbie shrugged. “I didn’t really know you were moving in today or I’d have prepared something properly.” Lies. But this glorious picture of perfection didn’t need to know that.

“Of course, I wasn’t expecting more,” he said. “I can’t eat cake, you see- I can’t have processed sugar. But I’m sure Stephanie will love it- Stephanie!”

This last part was called toward the side yard, and the banging stopped before the pink girl jogged around to join them, a tennis racket thrown over her shoulder.

“Hello,” she said, just as bright and happy as her father. He passed the container over to her.

“Our new neighbor just brought this for us,” he explained. “Why don’t you go set it in the kitchen? We haven’t got the plates in yet but the silverware is on the counter.”

“Okay, Sportacus.” She took the container and skipped into the house, and the man turned back to Robbie.

“I’m Sportacus,” he said. “And that’s Stephanie, my baby sister. What’s your name?”

Sportacus was a stupid name. Robbie very carefully didn’t say that. “I’m Robbie,” he said. “Robbie Rotten.”

“It’s nice to meet you Robbie!” Sportacus grabbed his hand in a crushing grip and shook it. “I’d invite you in for refreshment but as you may have heard, we haven’t even got plates yet.”

“Right- no, I wasn’t expecting anything. I just- you know, wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood!” He forced a grin, and suddenly something clicked in his head. Sportacus had called Stephanie his _sister_. Robbie leaned sideways and peered at the house. “So… your sister, huh? Not your daughter?”

“Oh, no!” Sportacus laughed. “I can understand the mistake, I’m definitely _old_ enough to be her father- but no, she’s my sister.”

“Ah, yes, your sister who’s just staying with you and will be going back home later.” Hope! Glorious hope! Sportacus gave him an odd look, and Robbie forced his face into a mask of interest.

“No-oo.” Sportacus shook his head. “She lives with me, our parents are sadly passed away.

Robbie very carefully didn’t let his disappointment show, instead looking around, everywhere but at Sportacus. Suddenly he saw them- approaching from the other side- and dragged his eyes back to Sportacus. He grabbed his hand to shake it again.

“Oh, well, I’m sorry to hear about that, so sorry for your loss, but I really must be going now, welcome to the neighborhood, goodbye, good luck, enjoy the cake, don’t worry about the container, see you later!”

With that he fled, almost diving through the hedges in his haste to get away, while Sportacus watched him go, clearly baffled.

-/-

“Wowee!” Ziggy said, as the two children leaned around the fence to spy on their new neighbor. “Look at those muscles! Do you think he’s a _superhero_?”

“Don’t be stupid, Ziggy,” Trixie scoffed. “Superheroes aren’t real. But golly, he sure could play one on tv, couldn’t he?”

“I bet he could be!” Ziggy argued. “I bet he could lift anything! I bet he could lift- I bet he could lift that big rock in the middle of the park!”

“No he can’t!” Trixie pushed Ziggy down and sat on him. “Nobody’s that strong, that’s gotta be the heaviest rock in the world! No one can lift it!”

“Oof! I bet he could! Ow! Trixie, get off!”

-/-

Sportacus looked around when he heard the shout. He’d thought he’d heard voices while he was grabbing the next box, but they were in the next yard so he’d assumed it was the neighbors. Now it was closer, and it sounded like someone was hurting. He set the boxes down and headed over to see.

There were two kids on the other side of the fence, a girl and a boy. The girl was sitting on the boy, who was trying to shove her off, but she was bigger than him and he wasn’t able to shift her.

“What’s going on?” he said, and the girl immediately jumped off of the boy. Sportacus spared her a glance and leaned down to help the boy to his feet. “Are you okay?”

“Uh-huh!” He trembled a little while Sportacus brushed the dirt from him, and, just as Sportacus made to stand up, the boy grabbed his arm excitedly. “Are you a superhero!”

“What?” Sportacus laughed. “No, I’m not! I’m just an ordinary man. I’m Sportacus, I’m moving into the house next door.”

“We know,” the girl said. “We were watching you. I’m Trixie, and that’s Ziggy. Sportacus is kind of a dumb name.”

He looked startled. “You think so?”

“Yeah! Wanna fight about it?” She raised both fists, and Sportacus suppressed a smile.

“All right. But not right now, okay? I’m trying to get moved in. Why don’t you come over, and we can fight later.”

This tactic seemed to confuse Trixie, who looked baffled before shrugging. “All right. Come on Ziggy, let’s go see!”

She took Ziggy’s arm and dragged him to the house, and only once the two had disappeared inside did Sportacus realize that these two children had just run right into a strange man’s house unsupervised. He touched his hand to his forehead and took a deep breath. Okay, first things first, shoo them outside. Then maybe drop some gentle advice about strangers. Then take a break to go meet the neighbors, so at least their parents could start getting to know- and trust- him. A deep breath. Okay.

He propped the door back open when he went in, and followed the sound of loud chatter into the kitchen, where Stephanie and the two kids were digging into the cake with forks they’d dug out of the silverware box. He stopped in the doorway and folded his arms thoughtfully. Stephanie seemed so- _happy_. He was worried.

Not that he didn’t want her to be happy, of course. But she’d lost her parents and had to move halfway across the country in such a short period of time. She shouldn’t be adjusting this well.

“I see you’ve both met Stephanie already. Stephanie, why don’t you get your soccer ball and take your new friends out into the yard? You can take the cake with you.”

“Sure!” Stephanie set her fork down and hurried up to her room, coming down a moment later with a pink and blue soccer ball. “Come on, guys, let’s go outside and play before my brother starts giving you advice about strangers.”

Sportacus looked startled. “It’s good advice though!” He stopped the two kids, and knelt so he could talk to them on their own level. “And it’s too late. Listen. I don’t mean any harm to either of you, but you only just met me. There’s no way to know that. It wasn’t a very good idea to go running into my house when we’d just met, and you don’t know that you can trust me. Do you understand?”

“But.” Ziggy frowned. “You seem nice. And you invited us over.”

“I invited you over, but not inside. I meant for you to play in the yard with Stephanie, where anyone in the neighborhood can look out the window and see you. Do you understand?”

“I think I do,” Trixie said, staring at her feet and kicking sheepishly at the ground. “It’s about stranger danger, right?”

“Right. It’s okay to get to know new people, especially when they’re your neighbors, but you have to be safe when you do. It was okay this time, but if I’d wanted to hurt you, I could have. Just be careful, okay?”

“Okay,” they chorused, and Ziggy added a quiet, “I’m sorry.” Sportacus smiled.

“It’s okay. I’m not angry. I just want you to be safe. Now go on outside and play- and have fun!” he called after them, when they ran after Stephanie. He straightened up and leaned back against the wall. Okay.

-/-

Robbie paced while he ate his cake, thoughts of his new neighbors running through his mind. He’d made a poor impression on Sportacus toward the end there- but he could probably turn it around. He’d seen the kids coming to spy, after all, and it was only a matter of time before Sportacus met them. Maybe he could take advantage of the fact that they seemed to think he was the world’s best babysitter, and use them to get him in with Sportacus. Get them to talk him up to the man, or something.

On the other hand… did he _really_ want to get involved with a man with a kid? Even if she was just his kid sister, he still played the role of a parent. Robbie had never dated a parent before. He had a strict no-kids policy in his life, one that he’d completely failed to uphold but still clung to nonetheless.

On the other other hand, this gorgeous Adonis had been pretty much dropped into Robbie’s lap, and he wasn’t about to pass up the chance to, ah, _get to know him_ better.

And on the other other… _other_ hand… getting involved with neighbors was never a good idea.

“Oh well,” Robbie said, scraping up the last bits of icing and dropping his paper plate into the trash. “It’s not like I don't have a history of making good choices or anything.

-/-

Sportacus gave it another half hour of moving boxes into the house before stopping. Stephanie and the children played with her soccer ball in the front yard while he did, and after a good ten minutes or so were joined by two other kids. The smaller of the two surveyed the area with a possessive air before saying, “I see you have made the decision to move into _my_ neighborhood.”

“That's Stingy,” Trixie said, gesturing at him. “And that's Pixel. They live here too.”

Stingy joined them in their play, the kids playing two-on-two with a couple of moving containers as goals, but Pixel sat on the porch steps and half-watched, keeping most of his attention on the handheld game he carried. He wasn't in the way, so Sportacus didn't mind stepping around him to get in and out of the house with the boxes.

“My brother was my soccer coach last spring,” Stephanie said, when Sportacus took a break and came over to check on the kids. “And he used to play for his college team. He's really good! He knows lots of really cool tricks. You should see them!”

“Stephanie...” Sportacus's ears turned a bright pink and he suppressed a smile. “They probably don't care about any of that.”

“I wouldn't mind seeing some cool soccer tricks,” Trixie said. “If they're any good, that is.”

The others chimed in with agreement, and Stephanie presented the ball to Sportacus with a smug smile. He took it and shook his head slightly, then moved over to the middle of their makeshift field, giving it a critical look to decide how to do this. If he wasn't careful, he could send the ball flying into the neighbor's yard and break something... hmm...

“You see that fork in the apple tree?” he said. They all turned to look; there was an apple tree at the edge of his yard, on the border between them and Robbie next door. There was a fork in it, just the size to trap a soccer ball. “Okay. Now...”

He turned around, ran some quick mental calculations, and tossed the ball in the air, turning a backflip as it cam down and sending it sailing, perfectly aimed, into the fork in question. There was a silence as he landed on both feet, not even bothering to turn around and see if he'd gotten the ball in place. He could tell by the stunned looks on the kids' faces, right before their faces lit up and they let out sounds of awe. Suddenly all four of them had surrounded him.

“That was _so cool_!” Ziggy said. “The way you just- tcha!- and then you- hwah!- and it just- went!” He was almost vibrating from excitement, trying to mimic Sportacus's motions while he talked, and Sportacus couldn't help laughing. He ruffled Ziggy's hair, and Ziggy looked up at him with adoration in his eyes. “How did you learn to do that?”

“A _lot_ of practice,” Sportacus said honestly.

“Can you teach _me_ how to do that?” Stingy demanded.

Sportacus considered. “Well... it took a long time for me to be able to do that. But I can teach you  _something_ . I know lots of trick shots, and I can show you some easier ones and if you work hard and keep at it, I'll show you the harder ones until you can do the same things I can.”

“That sounds like work,” Trixie grouched. Sportacus shrugged.

“You can't get anything without it, though.”

“ _Bo-ring_.” Trixie trotted over to the tree and scrambled up it to get the ball. “I'd rather learn to do easy stuff that doesn't take much work.”

“That's your choice, but you won't learn much with that mindset.” Sportacus took the ball from her. “Everything takes work. Even the simple tricks take time and effort to learn. But if you work hard, believe in yourself, and keep at it, you can learn to do just about anything.”

He set the ball on the ground and dropped into a handstand over it, carefully bringing up one hand to rest over it before slowly pushing his weight onto that hand instead. Finally he was supporting his entire weight on one hand on the soccer ball, perfectly balanced. There was more 'oohing' from the kids. He let himself drop and pushed off of the ground, spinning back up into a standing position. No sooner had he steadied than Ziggy was clinging to him again.

“Mr. Sportacus, are, are you _sure_ you're not a superhero?”

“I'm sure, Ziggy.”

“Hmph!” Trixie stuck her nose in the air and folded her arms. “You're a super _-showoff_!”

“Trixie!” Ziggy looked distressed. “Don't say things like that! That was really cool! And we asked him to show us his cool soccer moves!”

“Well who cares?” Trixie demanded. “It's not like it's _useful_ or anything.”

They looked like they were gearing up for a fight- or rather, Trixie did, and Ziggy looked like he was worried she was, so Sportacus passed the ball back to Stephanie and intervened.

“Listen, it's getting late. Why don't I walk you kids home and introduce myself to your families? I wanted to get to know my new neighbors today, after all.”

“Ooh ooh!” Ziggy grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the next house over, the one on the other side than Robbie's. “Come meet mine first!”

-/-

By the time they got all the kids walked home, it was dark, but they'd gotten to meet and spend a little time talking to their new neighbors. Sportacus told Stephanie that she could go out and play with the other kids tomorrow now that he knew the area better, as long as she stayed on the cul-de-sac itself.

“Not even the playground?” Stephanie asked, a whine touching her voice. He ruffled her hair and gave her shoulder a squeeze.

“I still have to see the area for myself,” Sportacus said. “Just be patient, Stephanie. This is still a new environment for us.”

“Okayyy.” She sighed, and slumped a little, then brightened. “At least we made some new friends today! I got to meet the other kids, and you got to meet a pretty guy.”

Sportacus's ears turned as pink as Stephanie's shirt. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

“The next door guy? With the cake? I _saw_ the way you were looking at him.”

“No idea,” he said again.

“Okay, Sportacus. Whatever you say.”

-/-

They didn't have many options for dinner that night. Ziggy's moms had baked them a cake when they'd seen the moving van pull in, and Sportacus was grateful, but even if he was able to eat sugary things, cake for dinner wouldn't be very good. They did have bread and peanut butter, and fortunately he'd had the foresight to throw a box of mixed fruits and vegetables in the backseat to snack on for the drive, so they combined that and had apple and peanut butter sandwiches for dinner. Not the best dinner, but both were too tired from the move to care.

By the time they'd done eating, Stephanie was yawning heavily, her eyelids drooping, and she was propped up on one hand at the table. He gave her a tired smile. “Why don't you head up to bed?” he said. “I'll clean up down here.”

“But it's both of our mess,” she protested half-heartedly. His smile softened.

“It's not a big mess. Go on up- I'll take care of it.”

“Okay.” She yawned, and slid to her feet slowly. “I'll-” Another yawn. “-say goodnight, then.”

“Goodnight, Stephanie. Sweet sleep.”

He gathered up the plates and cleaned them while he listened to Stephanie getting ready to bed- he could hear her humming the Twenty-Times-Time toothbrushing song he'd taught her when she was tiny. He grinned at that, but after a moment it faltered and he tossed his hat aside so he could run his fingers tiredly through his hair.

It wasn't supposed to be like this.

“But it is now,” he reminded himself. He grabbed his hat and glanced at the clock. It was past eight here, but it was still past seven where they'd moved from, and his body was on a very strict schedule that he'd been living on for years- he still had a good hour before he'd be able to sleep. Instead he slipped out the door, thinking of maybe taking a quick jog through the neighborhood. It was late enough that everyone would be inside, so it would be a peaceful time to run. Maybe he'd take a run at eight every evening- he didn't really feel like readjusting his sleep cycle, so a jog would be a good way to kill the extra hour.

He was just about to head in and tell Stephanie that he was going for a run when his eyes landed on the house next door- Robbie's. The lights were on, and a faint pink blush touched his ears. Stephanie had been right, of course, he _did_ think Robbie was attractive. He glanced at the counter, where the empty cake container was sitting, and smiled as he thought of something better. He skipped up the stairs and tapped on Stephanie's door.

“Stephanie? Are you in bed yet?”

“Just going,” she said. “What's up?”

“I'm going next door to return Robbie's container to him. I just wanted to let you know where I'd be.”

“Okay.” She gave him a knowing look. “I won't wait up for you.”

“Stephanie!”

“Good night, Sportacus! Tell Robbie thanks for the cake.”

He laughed and headed out, humming to himself while he made his way across the yard. He vaulted over the hedge rather than bother with the sidewalk, and trotted up to the door with a breathless grin. Probably nothing would come of it- they'd just met, after all- but there was no harm in getting to know the neighbors, right?

It took a lot of knocking to get Robbie to the door, and Sportacus was contemplating leaving and trying again tomorrow when he finally did answer. Sportacus turned back to give him a cheery hello in greeting and almost swallowed his tongue.

_Oh_ .

He'd apparently caught Robbie in the middle of a shower. His hair was damp and tousled, curling around his face delightfully. His skin was flushed pink, his face and neck and what of his chest was visible under the opening of his robe. (The robe was horrible. Sportacus told himself that was the only reason he wanted to get rid of it.) His shoulders were hunched enough to make Sportacus's own muscles cringe in sympathy, but there was a certain leanness to him that Sportacus couldn't take his eyes off of.

Sportacus was aware his mouth was open. He snapped it closed and dragged his eyes up to Robbie's face (grey-blue eyes, oh god, why did he look at his face) and, without a word, thrust the container into Robbie's face. Robbie folded his arms and looked from the container to Sportacus, one eyebrow raised in question.

“Thankyouforthecake,” Sportacus said. He cleared his throat. “I wanted to bring your container back. I didn't realize you'd be in the shower.”

Robbie's eyes flickered to the container again, staring at it. “Oh.” He reached out slowly and took it, reaching behind the door to set it down. “You didn't have to bring it back immediately.”

“I don't mind. Besides, I don't want it to get mixed up with our things.”

“Oh.”

Silence descended from on high, stretching into eternity while Sportacus sought for something- anything- to say, any reason to keep Robbie on this doorstep for just a moment longer. Robbie sighed. “Was there anything else you wanted?

“Um-” Sportacus shook his head, and took a half-step back. “No-o, nothing. Sorry. I'll let you get back to your shower now.”

He took another step back, and then turned and sprinted away without a backwards glance. He heard the sound of Robbie slamming his door behind him and thought a few rude words. He'd blown that, hadn't he?

He glanced at the house, and kept running. He'd take one lap around the neighborhood, just to cool off, and then go home.

-/-

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sportacus has very poor timing. Repeatedly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was going to be longer, since I like to have consistent chapter lengths, but I can't go any further without swapping to Stephanie's pov, and I don't want to do that in a chapter that is nine-and-a-half pages of Robbie and Sportacus being sexually frustrated at each other. Felt too much like whiplash. So I'll go ahead and end this chapter here, then swap over to Stephanie's first day of her new school in the next one.

o/o

Sportacus woke with the sun every morning, regardless of what time he'd gone to bed. This first morning in his new home was no different, and he dressed quickly and quietly so as not to wake Stephanie, then slipped outside for his morning run. He wanted to get a better look at the neighborhood than he had the night before, so that he could let Stephanie go explore for herself later.

When he passed by Robbie's house, he saw his neighbor leaning on one of the upstairs windows. He smiled and waved. “Hi Robbie!”

-/-

Robbie grumbled at the sunlight pouring through his window. He rubbed his eyes- he'd stayed up to meet the sun again, great. Oh well, the brats wouldn't be around till after school, he'd just sleep till then. He heard a door close in the distance, and realized his window was open- oh right, he'd needed to air the smoke out last night. He got up and stormed over to close it.

That neighbor of his was outside running. Robbie leaned on the window to stare. There was no way those shorts were legal- weren't there laws about indecent exposure or something? Those thighs just had to count.

“Hi Robbie!” Sportacus called, waving and giving him that bright smile. Robbie ducked down a little, feeling a little guilty over getting caught staring.

Robbie stayed at the window a few minutes longer, absently watching Sportacus make a lap around the cul-de-sac and disappear down the road and out of view. It was nice, this. The morning was just the right amount of brisk, the sun was promising to warm everything soon, and most importantly, it was quiet. There was nothing but some distant birds- annoying, but Robbie could at least tune them out- and- and-

-and then the peace was over with the sound of a blaring alarm.

Robbie had learned a few years ago that, for some reason that probably had to do with science, his house was in exactly the right spot to pick up any particularly loud sound that happened anywhere in the neighborhood. In this moment it was just the alarm blaring in Pixel's house beside his, but in a few minutes the neighborhood would be filled with the sound of activity as the parents and then later the kids all got up and got ready for the day.

Robbie groaned and slammed his window closed. It didn't do much to drown out the noise, but at least it reduced it.

He stormed up to his bedroom and collapsed onto his bed with a huff. He'd hoped to get to sleep before sunup today, so that maybe he would be dead to the world when the noise started. No such luck- now he'd have to wait till it was done. But that wasn't going to stop him from trying. He punched his pillow a few times to make it comfortable, and stuffed a pair of earplugs into his ears, then closed his eyes and waited for exhaustion to do its thing.

-/-

When Sportacus got home, he slowed down, but rather than heading inside immediately, he kept going on to Robbie's house. He'd given it some thought while he ran, and decided he was going to make up for the night before. He jogged up to the door and knocked, then knocked again when there was no answer.

-/-

It was not fair. Why was there knocking on his door? Robbie groaned and shoved his head under the pillow, but that didn't stop the knocking, so finally, with a sigh, he rolled out of bed and stomped downstairs to throw the door open.

It was the golden boy himself, shining bright like the sun and beaming. There was a flush to him that ought to be outlawed, he was breathing heavily, and Robbie fought not to be distracted by a bead of sweat sliding down the side of his face. Or the fact that his shorts were _still too short_.

“What?”

Sportacus looked surprised. “Good morning, Robbie,” he said. “I just wanted to know if you'd like to join me for breakfast.”

Robbie gave him a bleary look. “...why?”

“Because it'd be nice?”

Robbie carried on staring, weighing pros and cons. Pro, he'd get to spend some time with this glorious picture of perfection. Cons, he wouldn't get to sleep for a little while longer.

On the other hand, the neighborhood was now too noisy for him to get any sleep _anyway_ , so he shrugged. “All right. Fine.”

Sportacus's face lit up like the town Christmas tree on Christmas Eve. Robbie's knees went weak. He started reconsidering his stance on the pros of breakfast with him, and whether it might be a con after all.

-/-

Stephanie had a moment of panic when she woke up and Sportacus wasn't in the house, but a quick look around turned up a note on her door that read “Stephanie, gone out for a run, back in time for breakfast, <3 S”. Right. His morning run. She let out a slow breath, and chided herself for panicking. Of course it was just his morning run. What else would it be?

She headed downstairs and started slicing apples and oranges for breakfast. They'd have to get groceries today, she thought, not even her brother could keep living on just a crate of fruit.

The plates of food were ready by the time Sportacus came in, flushed and glowing. Their neighbor was with him, grumpy in rumpled clothing. She watched them out the corner of her eye. She knew her brother well enough to know when he had a crush, but did he have a _chance_?

“Good morning, Sportacus!” Stephanie chirped, and turned to Robbie. “And good morning to you, too, Mr. Robbie,” she added.

“I thought Robbie might like to have breakfast with us,” Sportacus said. “And good morning to you, too. Did you sleep well?”

“Yes. I'll get some more fruit.”

“No, don't worry, I'll get it. You two go ahead and eat.”

“Okay!” She took the plates over to the table, and set one in front of Robbie, who had taken the seat at the end and was pillowing his head on his arms. He sat up when she handed him the food, and gave it a confused look.

“What's this?”

“Breakfast! We haven't had time to get groceries, but apples and oranges are a great way to start the day.”

“We have juice, too,” Sportacus said. He was behind the counter, juggling the fruit he was meant to be slicing. Stephanie gave a fond eyeroll. He probably looked like he was showing off- but he did it all the time, and probably wasn't even aware of it entirely. “Do you want orange juice? We also have water, of course.”

Robbie looked horrified. “Juice? Water? _Fruit_?”

“What do you usually eat for breakfast?” Stephanie asked, grabbing an apple slice and nibbling it.

“I don't usually eat breakfast,” he said. Stephanie glanced over at her brother at this, amused by the scandalized look on his face.

“You- you _don't eat breakfast_?”

“I'm usually asleep right now. I don't wake up until lunch time.”

“But- but-” Sportacus dropped the fruit he was juggling. “But that's _so unhealthy_!”

“What's so unhealthy about it?”

Stephanie repressed the urge to giggle over how horrified Sportacus looked. Robbie ignored him, picking up an apple slice and sniffing at it hesitantly. His nose curled and he set the slice down, turning back to Sportacus.

“Right, I think I've imposed on your hospitality long enough. Now if you'll excuse me, it's past my bedtime, so I'm going home. Good day.”

He stood up and bowed with a slight flourish, then left before either of them could stop him. Once he was gone, Sportacus came over and sat down at the table. Stephanie covered her mouth so he wouldn't see her giggling, then pushed Robbie's barely-touched plate toward him.

“Cheer up, Sportacus,” she reassured him. “He liked the juggling, at least.”

Sportacus just lowered his head until it was resting on the table. “Why don't you go get ready for school, Stephanie?”

-/-

Robbie was in a state by the time he'd made it home. Unhealthy! Who were they to talk about him being unhealthy? And what did it matter if Robbie was healthy or not? It was his life, not Sportacus's. He had no reason to make comment.

And to invite him over for breakfast and not offer anything but- but- _fruit_! The nerve!

Robbie huffed and threw himself into his chair, folding himself up grumpily, pouting until he fell asleep.

-/-

Sportacus had spoken extensively to the principal of Stephanie's new school over phone before they moved, as well as the school's guidance counselor, the nurse, and her new teacher. They had all assured him, repeatedly, that Stephanie would be in good hands in their school, and he'd been forced to believe them. LazyTown Elementary had a good reputation, that's why he'd chosen it for her.

Still, that didn't stop him fretting a little once they'd parted at the office, Stephanie walking nervously down the hall in search of her classroom. He folded his arms over his chest and tried not to look as nervous as he felt. A teacher in the office gave him a sympathetic smile.

“You're new to parenting, aren't you?”

He had the decency to look embarrassed. “How'd you guess?”

“We usually see that face on parents of Kindergarteners. I'm Cadance,” she added. “I teach PE.”

“Sportacus,” he said, shaking her hand. “I used to take PE.”

This got him a laugh. “Still do, by the looks of it! Anyway, don't worry, she'll be fine. This is a very good school.”

“I know, that's why I chose it.” He gave her a sheepish smile. “Doesn't stop me worrying.”

-/-

Once he'd left the school, Sportacus decided to go grocery shopping. Their crate of fruit was running out, and he didn't want to have another meal of just apple sandwiches. It wasn't healthy for them.

(And maybe once he'd gotten some proper food in his house, and figured out when Robbie was actually awake and available, he could invite him over for a make-up meal and maybe get on the right track for a good impression.)

Sportacus had no idea where the grocery store was, but he figured it shouldn't be too hard to find. However, after getting lost in the business district of LazyTown for three hours without seeing a grocery store anywhere, Sportacus had to admit that he needed help. Unfortunately, he wasn't as good with adults as he was with kids, and after a few hesitant attempts to find a friendly-looking local to ask for directions, he sighed and went home. Plan B, then.

-/-

It was Sportacus. Of _course_ it was Sportacus. Robbie growled in frustration and pressed a cushion to his face. How did this man have such horrible timing? Why couldn't he visit when Robbie was actually in a _mood_ for visitors? How did he always manage to turn up when Robbie was sleeping?

Not to mention that he'd interrupted a _perfectly good_ _dirty dream_ , that incidentally he'd been the star of, now that Robbie thought about it with clarity. Robbie perked up. Maybe he could make something of this. The kids were all at school, and that would include the girl, too, right? If Sportacus had a few hours to kill, maybe Robbie could find a way to help him kill it.

“All right, all right, I'm coming,” he called, making his way to the front door and throwing it open. “What do you want?”

And honestly, did this man even _own_ clothes that fit? The collared shirt was a nice step up from the t-shirt, but it didn't do much when the buttons were straining against his folded arms. And the less said about his jeans, the better. Robbie fixed his gaze on the mustache. Anything to not embarrass himself.

“Hi, Robbie!” Sportacus said cheerily, as if he was completely unaware of the effect he was having on the man in front of him. He beamed. “I was wondering if I could ask you a favor.”

“Anything.”

Which was not what he'd meant to say. Damn the man. He made it hard to think. Sportacus just looked pleased, though.

“Excellent! I was trying to find the grocery store but I don't know my way around. I was hoping you could show me where it was at. If you're not busy?”

Robbie wanted to make an excuse, tell Sportacus that he _was_ busy and to get someone else, but he did need to restock on cake mix, and at least it would make up for storming out that morning. He sighed. The things he did for lust.

“All right. Let me just go change, and I'll be right there.”

-/-

He disappeared into the house with a slam of his door, and Sportacus allowed himself to breathe properly again. Honestly, it should be a crime to look that deliciously rumpled when Sportacus didn't have the option of ravishing him. Unfair.

Robbie reappeared ten minutes later, dressed in striped pants and a waistcoat, hair gelled down and still drying. Sportacus looked surprised.

“You're dressing up to go grocery shopping?”

“This isn't _dressing up_ ,” Robbie sneered. “I'm sure compared to the kind of clothes a jock like you would wear this must be the most formal, but for me it's casual.”

Sportacus suppressed a smile. “I'm not a jock.”

“Looked in a mirror lately? Now, let's go, I have to be back by three-thirty to watch the kids.”

Sportacus gave him a quizzical look while they headed out to his car. “The kids?”

“Yeah, the other little brats in the neighborhood, the ones you met yesterday. I look after them after school in the evenings. So I have to be home by three thirty to get them off the bus.”

“That's all right, I have to get Stephanie off the bus at the same time.”

They fell silent for awhile after that, Robbie occasionally breaking it to give Sportacus directions. While they were stopped at a red light, Sportacus drummed his fingers thoughtfully on the steering wheel, and spoke.

“If you don't mind my asking- why do you sleep in the mornings, instead of at night? No judgment,” he added hastily, when Robbie started to look indignant. “I'm just wondering.”

Robbie rolled his eyes. “It's not _that_ big a deal, is it?”

“It is unusual, though. If you don't want to tell me, you don't have to. I'm sorry about this morning, I didn't mean to seem offended. I was just shocked, that's all.”

“More like scandalized,” he said. “If you must know, it's because I work at night. So I sleep in the mornings.” Not to mention the insomnia, but Sportacus didn't need to know about that. He seemed like the sort who would start suggesting all sorts of solutions that involved a 'healthy' lifestyle. And Robbie was perfectly happy with his lifestyle. Apart from the lack of sleep, anyway.

“What kind of work do you do?”

“Oh... a little of this, a little of that. I do a lot of freelance jobs.”

“And babysit.”

“And babysit. The store's up here,” he added, pointing at the store in question. Sportacus pulled into the parking lot and they headed in.

Robbie trailed idly after Sportacus while he pushed the buggy through the store. “So what about you?” he asked. “What do you do for a living? Something athletic, I would imagine?”

“Not anymore,” Sportacus said with a laugh. “I'm a youth counselor, actually. I'm starting over at the youth center next week.”

“And the exercising?”

“I've got to stay in shape.”

He glanced around conspiratorially, and then gave the buggy a push before hopping onto the rail at the base. Robbie gave a startled laugh and followed him down to the end of the aisle, where he started inspecting the different kinds of peanut butter before deciding on the organic stuff. Robbie folded his arms in disgust. It was _peanut butter_ , why did it need to be _more_ healthy?

“Where's the produce aisle?” he asked, and turned that dazzling grin on Robbie. Robbie's heart stopped for a second. He really needed Sportacus to be a little less beautiful than he was. Or do it in a way that Robbie could actually act on.

“No idea,” Robbie said, turning away. “I've never had cause to visit it. Probably at the end, I would imagine.”

-/-

It was drawing near to three by the time Sportacus was satisfied that he had enough food to last himself and Stephanie for awhile. There were a lot of fruits and vegetables in his cart; Robbie had spent almost two hours watching Sportacus inspect each and every one before adding it to the cart, commenting at one point that he'd need to find out where the local farmer's market was, so he could get some fresher produce. Robbie had mock-gagged at the comment, and told Sportacus to count him out- he had no intentions of getting up at fuck-off o'clock to go buy _fresh produce_.

“Don't worry, Robbie, I'll find someone else to show me where it is,” Sportacus said, as they joined the checkout line. “You've been very kind to show me the grocery store as it is.”

“And don't forget it,” Robbie said. “I could have been sleeping if you hadn't come and woken me up.” And for nothing, it turned out. Sportacus would need to put away all his fruit when he got home, and it would be nearly time for the kids to arrive anyway. Unfortunate.

-/-

Sportacus was fidgeting by the time they made it back to the cul-de-sac, feeling that familiar itch to _move_ coming over him. He needed to run, to jump, to do flips or pushups or kick a soccer ball or _something_ , something that would cool down the energy searing his veins. He bounced on his heels while he grabbed an armful of groceries, loading up as many as he could carry and leaving only one for Robbie to grab, trailing after him into the house.

He was still bouncing while he put away the perishables, aware of Robbie's eyes burning into his neck. He missed his old house, with the big, open kitchen that he could flip around in while he worked. He couldn't do that here, but his open, empty, one-room house, more gym than home, hadn't been right for a young girl to grow up in. This was better, even if it did make him antsy.

“How long until the bus gets here?” he asked, fidgeting with an apple he was putting in the fruit cupboard.

Robbie checked his watch. “About twenty minutes.”

“That's enough time for a run,” Sportacus said, slightly relieved. Robbie's eyes widened.

“Didn't you _just_ run this morning? And the night before, too?”

“Yes. So?”

“That's way too much running.” Robbie stood, and shook his head. “I'm going home. Try not to injure yourself or something.”

Sportacus barely spared Robbie a glance while he stormed out, instead darting up to his bedroom to grab something better to run in. The jeans and collared shirt were nice for looking smart for Stephanie's teachers and for getting him some choice looks from Robbie, but not for running, especially not _his_ kind of running.

-/-

Robbie stormed into his house and slammed the door, then opened it and slammed it again for good measure. Running! In the middle of the day! How much time did he plan to spend _running_? Couldn't he think of anything better to do with that energy? Or any _one_ , Robbie thought, wishing he'd had the nerve to suggest Sportacus try something besides a run if he was that desperate to move.

 _Ugh._ And now he had the _absolute gall_ to run past _Robbie's house_ in a _tank top,_ where just anyone, and specifically Robbie, could _see him._ Robbie groaned and slumped forward, letting the wall catch his head and his arms hang limp below him. This man was going to be the _death_ of him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Just kiss already_.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find bts stuff for this fic, and lots of other fics too, at your local sportabean on Tumblr!


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